it's _______ friday

Dear All

There has been an error.

You may have noticed that today is Friday. Unfortunately we didn't.

Half of the editorial team (not me) has been away all week and both of them were "steaming drunk" last night after a group decision to massively celebrate England winning the football just in case we don't get another opportunity.

This friday, therefore, is Forgotten Friday. Enjoy!


It's A Friday (still drunk)

  Football Friday

Michael Owen...... still Michael Owen... still Michael Owen..... Oh! He's scored a WONDERFUL goal!

It's finally here. Euro 2004 football championship kicks off tomorrow and England play France on Sunday night. Obviously drinking is required to stem the nerves and, if you can get hold of one, it's always nice to have German around to abuse in a hilariously xenophobic manner.

It doesn't matter whether you actually enjoy watching football. You have to anyway... everybody else is watching it. There's quite literally nothing else to do.

Of course there are certain rules to be observed:

1) DO NOT take your shirt off if England score. It doesn't what the circumstances - you will still look like a nobber.

2) DO eat something massive and solid before the game commences (or during). You need to slow down the flow of liquid through your body so that you can delay that first trip to the toilet.

3) DO go to the toilet if we're losing because being in the bog almost gaurantees a goal will be scored.

4) ALWAYS support a substitution if it involves a Neville leaving the pitch (unless it means the other one is coming onto the pitch).

5) Watch BBC where possible.

Now. Here at It's A Friday we know that this Friday is a little bit single minded so, just to even things out a bit (equality is so important)... Girls: this week it's Cooking Friday. [runs and hides... somewhere secret]

i t h a n k y o u
  How you doin'?

Can you remember playing Kiss Chase (or the more advanced Knicker Chase) in Primary School? I can't. The girls only liked Neil Johnson and James Tillock so they wouldn't go near me.

In many ways those playground games were an early form of flirting… without words. And with more running. And more crisps. If only life were like that now. It isn't - you have to speak to people and smile a lot in order to even vaguely attract members of the opposite sex. (We’ve tried & tested the “sit-in-the-corner-looking-miserable-and-keep-staring-over-at-object-of-affection-until-they-notice” technique and it doesn’t work).

Do not, however, panic! Here at It’s A Friday we have devised a system to help each and every one of you in the mysterious world of flirtage. After all: with our charisma we should easily be able to help you find your ideal woman/man, or both. (Matt – do you mean a man and a woman, or do you mean a hermaphrodite?)

To help everybody familiarize themselves with the process a bit more today will be Flirting Friday. Below is a selection of lines for you to try out on those who you’d like to be “special friends” with. You must use at least one of these today or you’re a bottom-face.

Feel free to come up with some others. Go on, take the risk. After all, what's the worst that could happen? Apart from getting sacked for sexual harassment. Hurray!

Flirt away. We will be, and why not?

If you have any success please email and tell us. (Full description required. Photos optional)

i t h a n k y o u

* Or alternatively “I feel like Richard Gere because I’m ugly, have a massive nose and can’t act.”
Bored of boring old Friday? There's no need - now every Friday has a different theme with It's A Friday!

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Previous Fridays
October 2003
November 2003
December 2003
January 2004
February 2004
March 2004
April 2004
May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
September 2004
October 2004
November 2004
December 2004
January 2005
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005

BB Dancing
Things my girlfriend and I have argued about
niCe mUm (comedy)
The Chuckle Brothers
PopEx (music game)
International Talk Like A Pirate Day

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